People Will Talk Sh*t About Your Body But You Don’t Have to

Image: About a year into training.

People were always telling me: “Don’t get too big.”

When I first started personal training, I was working out with a trainer of my own. My goals were to build strength and understand what it felt like to have a trainer so I could become a better one myself. The fact that my muscles were growing in the process was a perk—or was it?

As my body became stronger, I started to hear comments from friends: “Be careful," they'd cringe. "Don’t get too big. You still want to look like a girl, right?” A few potential clients said, “Well, I want to get stronger like you, but I don’t want my arms as buff as yours." (No offense, they'd add.) My personal favorite, from my mother: “You're getting pancake boobs” My defined chest muscles were apparently making my boobs look flatter.

I looked at myself in the mirror and wondered if they were right. Was I too big? Did I have pancake boobs? 

When I looked in the mirror, I saw me a bigger, stronger, more physically capable me that was able to do the things I wanted to do—chin ups, deadlifts (in fact at the first gym where I worked out, I deadlifted more than Matt Damon/Jason Bourne himself). That was fun.

Ten years later and my body has changed yet again. In fact, it’s constantly changing.

I noticed that people will always have opinions about my body. The truth is words are powerful and sometimes they hurt - especially when it comes to our bodies.

So what can you do about it?

Take someone’s opinion (or your own) about your body and become curious about it using Byron Katie’s Four Questions.

Remember- this is your body and your story. You don’t have to be who you’ve always been and you can rewrite the stories that have been written for you. It is a kind practice, but not an easy one. Start becoming curious about your body stories and ask yourself these Four Questions. I’m rooting for you!